Oh, potty-training.
Well, if there’s one thing that unifies us as parents, it’s that we all have to deal with potty-training at some point or another.
And if there’s one thing that divides us, it’s how we go about it. And when.
There’s a lot of hoopla around potty-training.
Like a lot.
Everyone thinks they know the “right way” to potty-train. I’m here to tell you that there isn’t a right way. There’s a way that works for you & your kid. And that makes it right, no matter when or how you choose to do it.
I’ll share our potty-training experiences & my potty-training tips, but different strokes for different folks, y’know?
Especially when it comes to something like potty-training.
This post contains affiliate links.
(If you just want to skip straight to the list of things you need to make potty-training smoother, click here. If you want to know about our very different potty-training experiences with our son & daughter + my potty-training tips, keep reading.)
We have never “tried” to potty-train our kids (well, I tried for about 20 minutes, but more on that below). I have a 6 year old son and a 4 year old daughter. Our potty-training experiences with them were very different.
Maybe I’m the only Mom in the world who feels this way, but I was never in a rush to potty-train. I think diapers are easy & I was never in a hurry to get out of them. Sure, diapers are expensive. But they make up for it in convenience.
My son potty-trained around 3.5+ years old. There were many people who couldn’t believe we hadn’t potty-trained him before then. Add to that the fact that my son is absolutely huge for his age—and always has been. He’s an extremely tall & big little boy. So that just compounded everyone’s surprise that he was still in diapers at 3 years old.
Fortunately, I had a husband who not only supported my desire to not rush potty-training, but who wholeheartedly agreed. He’s a urologist and though he doesn’t do pediatrics, one of his former colleagues is a renowned pediatric urologist—Dr. Steve Hodges. He writes books on potty-training. Literally.
When many of my Mom friends were potty-training their kids around 2 years old using the “3 day method,” I watched and listened. Most of them were successful. I was pregnant with my daughter & not eager to get my son out of diapers, but I decided to give it a try since 1) they made it look so easy and 2) I thought, “Okay, well I only have 1 child now so maybe it’s a good idea to knock this out before I have my baby.”
I tried potty-training for one morning. Actually, if we’re being honest, it was about 20 minutes.
In that 20 minutes, my 2.5 year old little boy listened to me, took off his diaper, peed on the floor and then showed me proudly. He did exactly what I’d asked him to try to do, albeit in the wrong spot. But my reaction broke him. I saw it and said “Oh no, not on the floor honey! We don’t want it on the floor, we want it in the potty!”
Rookie mistake.
Looking back, I still bothers me that I got upset with him on his first try of a brand new thing. A thing he actually had listened to me about and just hadn’t done it exactly like I wanted.
My response crushed him. I saw the disappointment in him—disappointment in himself and in my response—and realized I was stressing my baby out. Yes, baby. 2.5 years old is a baby in my book.
I decided right then we weren’t ready—not him and not me. I held him, he cried, I cried, & then I called my husband and said “I’m not doing this, we’re not ready.” And he said, “Great. I don’t think we should be in any rush.”
God I love that man.
Later he called his friend Dr. Hodges to discuss it & Dr. Hodge’s biggest potty-training tip was not to rush. He pointed out that (save for children with special needs) every child potty-trains eventually. It’s not a race. Dr. Hodges sees all kinds of complications in children that can stem from potty-training too soon & kids not emptying all the way (see: prolonged bed-wetting & constipation, etc.). I’m not a doctor so I’m not going into any of that. I agree with some of it & I disagree with some of it.
Again, I’m not a doctor.
But I am a Mom.
And what I say is this:
What works for your kid, works. If they potty-train younger than most = GREAT! If they potty-train later than most = GREAT!
You do you. Or actually just let them do them.
I have many, many friends whose kids were fully potty-trained by 2 years old. Successfully and perfectly.
I have many, many friends whose kids were fully potty-trained by 4-5 years old. Successfully and perfectly.
When we did potty-train my son, it’s because he was talking about going potty. He was ready. I had a brand-new baby at home in diapers so I wasn’t thrilled that he was ready, but we rolled with it. He did beautifully. He started out sitting down to pee, then started standing up. To this day he usually stands but will occasionally sit to pee (kind of like my husband now that I think about it, ha).
Caveman-style.
He struggled with pooping in the potty at first. This is totally normal. It can be a really scary thing for kids. They worry about it splashing, about the sound it will make, about how it will fall out—you name it. He wanted to wear a diaper to poop, so we put one on him when he asked for it. Then when he inevitably pooped in the diaper, we’d empty it in the potty together & flush it.
One of the best things I bought was the Squatty Potty (linked below—I gotcha). We now own 3 if that tells you anything. Ever notice how little kids will do a little bend or an almost-squat when they are pooping in their diaper? It’s because that angle un-kinks the colon & allows the poop to come out in more of a straight shot.
Yes, we’re talking a lot about poop. But just keeping it real. There’s a lot of poop in Motherhood.
It took one time of him successfully pooping on the potty (while crying the whole time) to get rid of diapers for good. The second it came out he was so relieved & so thrilled that he’d done it. He never put on a diaper again. (We never messed with pull-ups. Or stickers/treats, etc., because we ended up just letting potty-training happen more organically….but I know that works for lots!)
Which meant we had to convert his crib to a toddler bed. Yes, he was 3.5 and yes, he was still in his crib. He loved his crib & so did we. He never once tried to climb out of it & he never once complained about it. It kept him contained & in his room…& happy. He actually cried when we changed it to the toddler bed, though of course he LOVED it immediately.
I already told you I’m not a Mother who feels the need to rush through any of these parenting/child milestones. And I wasn’t lying (obvi). I’m a big believer in the whole “the days are long but the years are short” thing.
So that was him. And this is her:
My daughter was ready to start potty-training when she was 2.5.
Potty-training wasn’t on our radar at all with her because our son was ready later. But, SHE started talking about the potty. Wanting to sit on the potty. She has a big brother & she wants to be just like him. So it only makes sense that she wanted to go potty like him, too. (And quite literally, might I add. That little girl wanted to stand up & pee just like her bro.)
She was ready to potty-train.
So we pulled our tiny toilet back out & just set it in the bathroom for her to try. She started using it. She surprised us how quickly she got it. So much so that she had to wear her brother’s little boxer undies for a few days while I Amazon primed her some.
She still wore diapers during naps & bedtime for about 6 months after she started potty-training.
My son never did that. He went straight from diapers to no diapers, period. But she was happy wearing diapers at naps & bedtime, and so was I. And I was in no rush to convert her bed so that she can get out & go potty on her own. I hold onto the crib years as long as I can because sometimes confinement = sanity (for Mama). Just like her brother, for a little while my daughter still requested a diaper to poop (constipation/hard poops make learning to go in the potty tougher).
My best potty-training tip is not to stress about it. And not to stress your child.
They will potty-train. It might be easy for her. It might be hard for him. She might do it later than you expect. He might do it earlier than you expect.
This is one of those things I think you just have to live your way into.
Another potty-training tip I want to give is this: If what you’re doing isn’t working, stop.
If what you try causes stress, stop. If you need to quit & try again a full year later like I did, do it. Don’t be swayed by what everyone else around you is doing. Do what works for you. And yours.
And my last potty-training tip: Be prepared for comments from others.
Whether your child potty-trains earlier or later, someone is always going to have something to say. I can promise you that. There’s definitely some judgment when it comes to potty-training. Prep yourself for being able to brush it off because you’re the Mom and you know what you’re doing (because even when we don’t, we do).
Oh, and if your preschool/daycare pressures you, don’t bend to it. Schools are in the habit of pushing & stressing about potty-training. Your kid is your kid. Not theirs. Stand up for what you want.
I have a friend whose daughter potty-trained really young & the school wasn’t “prepared” to have a child that young going to the potty. So they had to switch schools. I think the original school should’ve been more flexible & accommodated this little girl who was ready to use the potty. They have since made the necessary changes.
And then I have another friend who got berated by her daughter’s school for not being fully potty-trained by the time they thought she should be (2 years old!). One day, when her child realized she needed to go potty but was outside on the playground, she went off to a corner by herself, pulled down her panties like she’d been taught, and went. I applaud her for that. So did her parents. Her teachers did not.
You can’t win. At least that’s what it feels like sometimes. And it’s definitely what our kids feel like sometimes.
So there you go. I have 2 kids and had 2 very different potty-training experiences.
There was no “one right way.”
Both of my kids are potty-trained. Both are happy. And besides those stressful 20 minutes that one time, both potty-trained with no pressure.
Now, here’s all the shit you need for all the shits. Just kidding, my mom would kill me for saying that. But it was too perfect & I couldn’t resist. Here’s what you need:
Potty-training List
(items that made potty-training as smooth as possible for us):
Small Starter Potty: This one looks like a real potty & I really think there is value in that. It looks just like a smaller version of yours. It also makes a flushing sound, which kids LOVE to do. (Seriously, you’ll have to put a cap on the flushing in general cuz they’re obsessed). We only got one of these because we transitioned to the regular toilet as soon as they showed interest (see below).
Travel potty FTW.
Toilet Training Top: This is a total must-have. We have 3—one for each kid’s bathroom & one for the bathroom by the kitchen. It makes your toilet “their size.” They love it because it keeps them from falling in & makes them feel very secure. It’s super easy to clean & super easy to take with you on a trip or to Grandma’s or wherever.
With both kids we let them start in the small potty linked above, and the second they started wanting to go on the real potty we were all for it. So much easier (zero clean up) & makes it much easier for them to go on public toilets, too, because they’re used to it.
Squatty Potty: I’d say this is our other true must-have. Like the toilet top above, this is something my kids used every single day (& still often do!). It helps them poop so much more easily because it gives them a way to “bear down.” It doubles as a stool for them to climb onto our full size toilets, too. It was a game-changer for us.
Books: We didn’t go heavy on reading potty-training books. But both our kids love Daniel Tiger & this Daniel Tiger potty book is one that they both freaking loved. They can push a button to make a real flushing sound. I do think this book helped them be excited about the potty. The only other one we got was this Potty book because the “Yummy Yucky” book from the same author was one of their all-time faves.
Travel Potty: With my son, we honestly just let him pee on the pavement between the car doors if he needed to suddenly go potty. So I never needed a travel potty. With my daughter, we did that a couple times with me holding her while she squatted but it’s too hard to avoid getting it on her panties or shoes, so I wised up & bought a little travel potty & it has been AWESOME. I keep it in the back of my car & she goes right in the trunk. (And if I’m being totally honest, so do I. I use it all the time. Maybe it’s all the coffee I drink. Maybe it’s a leftover side effect from labor.) Then we pour it out, wipe it out, and voila! Done. We use it every single time we’re out & about.
If you have a little girl I highly recommend getting one to keep in the back of your car. If you have a little boy you can either be one with nature like us (ha) or perhaps be a more respectable human being and get one. Runner ups: this super simple Ikea one or this one.
Fave boy undies: these little boxer briefs (ahhhh why are these SO CUTE on them?!!) and these classic undies. Both super soft. Size up.
Fave girl undies: THESE. I tried a few types and these are the clear winners. Adorable designs, super soft & thick without being too thick, no elastic to cut into them. Size up.
Thing I didn’t know I needed but actually really like: these toilet seat covers for when you’re out & about. I grew up putting TP on the seat in public places & did the same thing for my kids. BUT, kids love to hold onto the sides of the potty or prop their hands on the back (especially in public places because they feel like they might fall in), and the TP doesn’t cut it. These cover the whole thing & then you just toss them. I keep them in the diaper bag. Will I ever stop carrying a diaper bag even though there are no longer diapers in it? I think not. (I actually carry a diaper backpack that I freaking love & will never give up.)
Mom Potty-Training Pro Tip: These prune pouches. Seriously, these things are MAGIC. I used religiously FOR YEARS when my kids were struggling to go. They are a total mom-hack & I’ve been tempted to try one on more than one occasion. They’re just prunes + water. We kept these on hand 24/7. My kids would actually ask for “a purple pouch” when their tummy didn’t feel right. Kids get constipated. It’s a thing. These work. (And trust me, there’s so much to be said for making it easier for kids to poop, especially when they’re potty-training.)
Probiotics: It seems like it makes sense to share these here. Love these—gut health is important (especially when/if your kid is taking antibiotics. Or if they just came back from their grandparents’ house, ha.).
*If your child is on the bigger side or later to potty train (my son was both), these booster pads are a MIRACLE. At 3+ years old, his diapers would be soaked & overflowing. They couldn’t contain the amount of pee he had overnight. I found these booster pads & at night you just stick them in the diaper where they pee (make sure they don’t stick out the top of the diaper). They worked wonders & bought us probably 6 more months in diapers than we could’ve gotten with just diapers alone (his diapers were so full they were soaking through his PJs).
Questions about potty-training? Leave them in the comments. Already tackled potty-training? Tell me what worked for you & what potty-training items you loved.
Want more Mom Hacks & Tips? —> Check out why we LOVE the HOMER Learning App (ahem, guilt-free screentime)!
Or our favorite KwikStix “Paint Crayons” that we use for everything!
And if you’re struggling with getting your kids to clean up, this kid’s hourglass timer mom hack is coming to your rescue!
Like this post? Join MAMA’s email list to get more like this. All things MOMish—the MOMents + MOMfessions, & all the Mama Must-Haves!
Pin this for later!
66 comments
What’s up friends, its wonderful post on the topic of teachingand fully explained, keep
it up all the time.
The next occasion Someone said a weblog, I am hoping that this doesnt disappoint me as much as this. Come on, man, I know it was my choice to read, but I just thought youd have something intriguing to talk about. All I hear is a couple of whining about something you could fix when you werent too busy trying to find attention.
The next time I just read a blog, I hope so it doesnt disappoint me about this blog. I mean, It was my solution to read, but I personally thought youd have something interesting to convey. All I hear is a handful of whining about something you could fix in the event you werent too busy trying to find attention.
The first gamer starts with all the initial betting also it progresses with all the change of hands.
Every weekend i used to pay a visit this web page, as i wish for enjoyment, for the reason that this this web page
conations really nice funny material too.
Hmm it looks like your website ate my first comment (it was super long) so I guess I’ll just sum it up what I submitted and say, I’m thoroughly enjoying your blog. I too am an aspiring blog blogger but I’m still new to everything. Do you have any helpful hints for newbie blog writers? I’d certainly appreciate it.
Perfectly composed written content, Really enjoyed examining.
Pretty! This was a really wonderful post. Thank you for your provided information.
Hurrah, that’s what I was exploring for, what a information! present here at this blog, thanks admin of this site.
Your style is so unique in comparison to other folks I have read stuff from.
Many thanks for posting when you’ve got the opportunity,
Guess I will just bookmark this site.
Some really nice stuff on this web site, I like it.
You actually make it seem so easy along with your presentation but I to find
this matter to be actually something that I believe I’d never
understand. It kind of feels too complex and extremely vast for me.
I am looking forward for your subsequent submit, I’ll attempt to get
the cling of it!
Hello I am so delighted I found your blog page,
I really found you by accident, while I was looking on Google
for something else, Regardless I am here now and would
just like to say many thanks for a fantastic post and a
all round entertaining blog (I also love the theme/design), I
don’t have time to browse it all at the minute but I have
book-marked it and also added your RSS feeds, so when I have time I will be back to read a lot more, Please
do keep up the excellent b.
I believe this web site has some rattling superb information for everyone :D. “When you get a thing the way you want it, leave it alone.” by Sir Winston Leonard Spenser Churchill.
Hi, yes this article is in fact nice and I have learned lot of things from it about
blogging. thanks.
My brother suggested I might like this website. He used to
be totally right. This post actually made my day.
You can not imagine simply how much time I had spent for this
info! Thank you!
Hurrah, that’s what I was searching for, what a stuff!
existing here at this web site, thanks admin of this site.
I reckon something really special in this internet site.
I really liked your blog article.Really looking forward to read more. Much obliged.
There is clearly a lot to know about this. I consider you made various good points in features also.
I do not even know how I ended up here, but I thought this post was good. I don’t know who you are but certainly you’re going to a famous blogger if you are not already 😉 Cheers!
Well I definitely liked reading it. This tip offered by you is very practical for proper planning.
I will bookmark your weblog and take a look at again right here regularly.
That is a really good tip particularly to those new to the blogosphere. Brief but very accurate information Appreciate your sharing this one. A must read article!
Well I sincerely liked studying it. This tip procured by you is very useful for accurate planning.
Rattling clean internet internet site , appreciate it for this post.
Thanks , I ave recently been searching for information approximately this subject for a long
Hello, i think that i saw you visited my weblog so i came to “return the favor”.I’m attempting to find things to improve my website!I suppose its ok to use a
few of your ideas!!
Hi there! This post could not be written much better!
Looking through this article reminds me of my previous roommate!
He constantly kept preaching about this. I will send this information to him.
Fairly certain he’ll have a very good read. Thanks for sharing!
I like the helpful info you provide in your articles.
I’ll bookmark your weblog and check again here regularly.
I’m quite certain I will learn many new stuff right here! Best of luck
for the next!
Hi there Dear, are you actually visiting this web site daily, if so afterward
you will absolutely get good know-how.
Greetings! I’ve been following your blog for a while now and finally got the courage to
go ahead and give you a shout out from Houston Tx! Just wanted to
mention keep up the excellent job!
Hello, i think that i saw you visited my website thus i came to “return the favor”.I am attempting to find things
to enhance my web site!I suppose its ok to use some of your ideas!!
I’m extremely impressed with your writing skills as well as with the layout on your blog.
Is this a paid theme or did you customize it yourself? Either way keep up the nice quality writing, it is rare to see a nice blog like this one nowadays.
Hello there! I could have sworn I’ve been to this website before but after browsing through many of the
articles I realized it’s new to me. Nonetheless, I’m definitely pleased I discovered it and I’ll be bookmarking it and checking back regularly!
Nice post. I learn something new and challenging on blogs I stumbleupon every day.
It will always be useful to read through content from other writers and practice something from other web
sites.
Wow, this paragraph is fastidious, my younger sister is analyzing these things, so I am going to convey her.
hi!,I like your writing so a lot! proportion we keep in touch more about
your article on AOL? I need a specialist in this area to solve my problem.
Maybe that is you! Taking a look ahead to see you.
After exploring a handful of the articles on your site, I seriously like your
way of blogging. I bookmarked it to my bookmark webpage list
and will be checking back soon. Take a look at my website too and let me know how you
feel.
Amazing! Its in fact amazing paragraph, I have got much clear
idea regarding from this article.
Hello there, just became alert to your blog through Google, and found that
it’s really informative. I’m going to watch out for brussels.
I’ll be grateful if you continue this in future.
Lots of people will be benefited from your writing.
Cheers!
At this time it seems like Drupal is the top blogging platform out
there right now. (from what I’ve read) Is that what you’re
using on your blog?
Wonderful blog! Do you have any tips and hints for aspiring writers?
I’m planning to start my own site soon but I’m a little lost on everything.
Would you suggest starting with a free platform like WordPress or go
for a paid option? There are so many choices out there that I’m completely confused ..
Any suggestions? Appreciate it!
Incredible story there. What occurred after? Thanks!
I always emailed this website post page to all my contacts, for
the reason that if like to read it afterward my links will too.
Hello to every body, it’s my first visit of this webpage; this web site carries amazing and genuinely excellent data in favor of
visitors.
wait is he a girl or a boy, im confused
wait is he a girl or a boy 🤔
I love your blog.. very nice colors & theme.
Did you make this website yourself or did you hire someone to do it for you?
Plz respond as I’m looking to construct my own blog and
would like to know where u got this from. thanks a lot
Very good info. Lucky me I recently found
your website by accident (stumbleupon). I have bookmarked it for later!
What i do not understood is if truth be told how you are now not actually much more smartly-liked than you may be right now.
You’re so intelligent. You realize therefore significantly in relation to this matter, made me for my part imagine
it from a lot of varied angles. Its like men and women are not fascinated except it’s one thing to accomplish with
Lady gaga! Your own stuffs excellent. All the time care for it up!
But wanna comment that you have a very nice website , I enjoy the pattern it actually stands out.
Exceptional post however I was wanting to know if
you could write a litte more on this subject? I’d be very thankful if you could elaborate a little bit more.
Appreciate it!
I blog often and I seriously appreciate your content. The
article has really peaked my interest. I will take a note
of your blog and keep checking for new details about once per week.
I opted in for your Feed too.
It’s in fact very complicated in this full of activity life
to listen news on Television, thus I simply use the web
for that reason, and obtain the most recent information.
dating sites
I have fun with, cause I discovered just what I was looking for.
You have ended my 4 day lengthy hunt! God Bless
you man. Have a nice day. Bye dating sites
scoliosis
Great article, exactly what I needed. scoliosis
scoliosis
Hey there just wanted to give you a quick heads up. The text in your article seem to be running off the screen in Ie.
I’m not sure if this is a format issue or something
to do with internet browser compatibility but I figured I’d post to let
you know. The layout look great though! Hope you get the problem solved soon. Cheers scoliosis
So helpful! Thank you so much! I’ve already been stressing a little about when I should start potty training! This helps me so much!
I swear I think the biggest key to potty-training is not to stress at all about it. Because they totally pick up on our stress, and then it stresses them in return. I think living your way into potty-training and following your kid’s pace is the easiest way ❤️
This was so encouraging I’ve been struggling feeling mom shame for not having my 3 year old potty trained like most his friends but I l’ve learned with him if I push it’s a horrible situation for us both and then he doesn’t forget either which makes it harder. Your experience is definitely the confident boost I needed to know I’m doing the right thing waiting for him to be ready.
I’m so glad our experiences with potty-training helped you feel confident in your Momming! Seriously, I get it. My son was definitely “later” by some standards (who sets these standards anyways?), but he potty-trained so easily & smoothly when I dropped the pressure and just let him get there on its own. And it was easier for me, too! Follow your gut and your heart & don’t worry for a second about what others are thinking/saying. 3 is still SO YOUNG! There’s no rush, they have the rest of their lives to use the potty. 💕
Thank you for this! I feel like my soon to be 4yr old is the only kid I know not potty trained. He just has no desire at all even though his twin brother is fully potty trained. Im trying to let him do his own thing and hope it just clicks one day.
You are so welcome! I felt pressure, too. From myself, from the world…but he will get there. They all do. Go easy on yourself & go easy on him. I know that’s easier said than done. ♥️
Oh my gosh I love this. I have been wondering about potty training my son. He seems a little interested so I bought a small potty for him but don’t want to do the wrong thing. It’s hard being a mom and knowing exactly what is right for your kid sometimes.
It is SO hard! We want to do right by our kids but it’s hard to know what’s right! For us the key to potty-training was no pressure. That’s it. Everything else fell into place. Hang in there!
This article was just what I needed to read! I have a newly minted 3 year old and I was feeling pressure to potty train (mostly self imposed). We gave it a shot this weekend and it totally backfired. My daughter was such mess whenever we mentioned the toilet and got even more worked up when she had accidents. Clearly she wasn’t ready and I don’t think we were either. We decided to take a step back and start at the basics. Thank you for your advice.
It backfired the first time we tried it with my son. I’m not even sure what made me try it except several of the kids in his class were doing it and I just felt this pressure about it. Now I know it was not the right time and so silly for me to put any pressure on my child or myself about it!! Taking a step back was the best thing we could’ve done. Good on you for realizing that about your daughter, Mama! Sometimes it’s hard to do that. It sounds like you’re doing the right thing for her and you! <3
My three year old is very independent. When we tried to push potty training, she wasn’t having any of it. Then suddenly when she turned 3, she was ready and I mean she herself was ready, then literally over night, she was going on the potty. I’ve learned we can’t push or kids to do things. Forgot about what other parents are doing because every child is different and learns things on their own pace. They need to be comfortable with transition and learning new things. Thank you for sharing your stories!
Oh my goodness, my daughter was/is the same way! We never even really talked about it & one day she just decided she wanted to start using the potty. You are so right about every child being different. There is no one-size-fits-all. And the sooner we realize that the better! You sound like a great Mom.
So helpful. I have not known what to do/how to start/what to expect. And it feels like there is this pressure to potty-train. This makes me feel better about not rushing & not worrying about people’s comments.
I know exactly what you mean about the pressure around potty-training. I felt it, too, but ultimately realized there was no reason to rush my kid. They’ll let you know when they’re ready. Until then, sit back & buy those diapers in bulk. No shame in the diaper game 🙂